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Hey little sister, what have you done?
Hey little sister, who’s the only one?
Hey little sister, who’s your superman?
Hey little sister, who’s the one you want?
Hey little sister, shotgun!
– Billy Idol, White Wedding
So it’s Friday night at 10, and David is, unfortunately, still at work. Fortunately for me, though, this allows me to indulge in one of my favorite guilty pleasure shows – Say Yes to the Dress on TLC.
The premise behind this show is that women come to Kleinfeld – a widely known high-end bridal salon in Manhattan – to search for the perfect wedding dress. Each of them is paired with a “consultant,” which is really just a fancy word for salesperson, and shown multiple dresses in the hopes that one will catch the bride-to-be’s eye (and wallet).
This show is like the ultimate in wedding porn. Kleinfeld carries thousands of dresses in all styles and price ranges. That is, assuming your price range starts around $1500. The brides generally come in with a budget, be it $1500, $3000, or $10,000. Sometimes, like tonight’s lesbian couple searching for “matching pantsuits,” the budget is unlimited. This is actually the part of the show that irks me the most: no matter what the stated budget is, the consultants – without fail, always bring in dresses that are out of the bride’s price range. The goal, of course, is to get the bride to fall in love with one of those dresses, and they count on the absolute madness that surrounds so many women planning weddings – the idea that the day has to be perfect and that every detail matters immensely – to convince her that she must have THIS dress or the wedding will be a disaster. It’s kind of unsavory, frankly. And watching the struggle some of these brides and their families go through – one bride’s obviously working class mother agreed to take a second job to afford the out-of-her-price-range dress her daughter wanted - is a little more reality than this show needs, I think. It should be pure fantasy.
To be honest, however, part of the appeal in watching this, for me, is to marvel at that very same madness that I just criticized. It’s amazing to me that women will pay thousands of dollars for a wedding dress. I just cannot fathom that. Even those brides whose wedding budgets would have paid for my law school education with change leftover – I just don’t get it. It’s one day, you wear the dress for 6 hours, and you never wear it again. And you can’t do anything else with it, either, except put it in a box and hope you have a daughter who might want to wear it. I’d rather spend the money to rent a Dippin’ Dots cart.
And I don’t travel in circles where these kinds of things matter, either. My mother would die if I told her I wanted to spend $2000 on a wedding dress. I happen to know that Aimee got everything – wedding dress, veil, undergarments, shoes, etc – for under about $700. And her dress was absolutely perfect for her. See?
(That’s hands-down my favorite picture of her, ever.)
And if I were as crafty as Lydia, I’d make my own wedding dress, too. I absolutely love the pattern she chose. Oooh, maybe I’ll pay Lydia to make my wedding dress!
Look: there’s no doubt the dresses on this show are, for the most part, beautiful. And if these women are comfortable spending that kind of money for a dress, and it makes them happy, then more power to them. I’ll just sit back and enjoy the show.
Las Vegas is sort of like how God would do it if he had money.
– Steve Wynn
Things I did in Las Vegas:
1. Played Blackjack for money for the first time (and won $10 – it would have been $20 if I’d taken a hit and pushed on the last hand instead of losing, but no).
2. Went to the Ghost Bar. Which looks just like it did on Real World: Las Vegas, but isn’t really anything special except for the view of the Strip. Otherwise, it’s your average bar, only with much worse lighting.
3. Lost $20 in the fastest amount of time known to man by betting on War. Yeah, that’s right, War. Like the game you play with your brother when you’re bored on a rainy day. I kept seeing the game and asking David, “How can you bet on War?” Well, finally, one wily dealer got me to do just that, and in 4 hands – at the $5 minimum bet per hand – I was done. So to save you all the money, here’s how it works: You place your bet, the dealer deals you one card face up, then he deals himself one card face up. If his card is higher, you lose. If his card is the same, you lose. If his card is lower, you win. Dumbest. Casino game. Ever.
Things I did not do in Las Vegas:
1. See the dolphin habitat at the Mirage. We kept intending to do it and then we spent more time on our morning excursions than we planned, and then it was too late, and on the last day, we got there 30 minutes after it closed. Boo. This is my one regret about our otherwise perfect trip.
2. Win more money than I bet. I did ok and had some beginner’s luck at video poker (so addictive), and I stuck to my budget, which is the most important thing.
3. Get married. Four people asked if we were going to get married while we were out there. The answer is, of course, no. Not that it didn’t cross our minds, and we joked about it, but in the end, when it happens, we want our family and friends to be there.
*with apologies to Crimey
Happiness is not in the mere possession of money; it lies in the joy of achievement, in the thrill of creative effort.
– Franklin D. Roosevelt
Guess what I did? I joined a team that is participating in the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure in Boston on September 7, 2008! This is my first year as a team member, but Team GDT has been around for 5 years, and last year, they were the top, non-corporate team fundraiser – 50 or so women raised more than $80,000 to help find a cure for breast cancer! I am so proud to be a part of the team this year and try to help exceed that amount, and I am really looking forward to spending time with so many friends I’ve never met before (and even some that I have!).
On a personal note, my mother is a 2-year breast cancer survivor, and I am so thankful for the advances in detection, treatment, and rehabilitation that made that possible. The Komen race and Team GDT are a chance for me to give back and help other families who are still struggling with this disease, and, ultimately, to help find a cure so that no more families have to face it.
I’m also planning to run the race, a 5K, which is something I’d never thought I’d do, but I am diligently working the Couch to 5K program, and hopefully by September, I’ll really be able to run the whole thing!
My personal fundraising goal is $500, which I think is definitely attainable. If you’re so inclined, any support would be greatly appreciated. Click here for my individual donation page. If you donate in memory, in honor, or in celebration of someone, and would like me to wear their name on my shirt during the race, I would be honored to do so. Please email me at hearmeintheharmony@gmail.com to let me know.
I’ll be posting a Team GDT page up at the top in a few days, so if you can’t donate now but want to, you can come back whenever you like before the race and do so, or if you just want to check my progress, you can see it there, too.
Thank you for supporting me, Team GDT, and the Komen Foundation.
You may send poetry to the rich; to poor men give substantial presents.
– Marcus Aurelius
It’s almost my birthday and I’m getting a fat tax refund check this year. No, I’m not blowing it all; in fact, nearly all of it is going to pay off my credit card. But I am saving about $200, give or take, to buy myself something nice. So far, I have narrowed it down to three things:
1. Food Saver (for a persuasive argument on why I need one, see here)
2. digital camera (I may be the only person in the world without one, and until now, I haven’t really wanted one, but blogging is more fun when there are pictures, I think)
3. scanner (this is the one I’m least familiar with – I really just want to scan old photos so I can save them on my computer, but space-wise, it might make sense to replace my old ink jet printer with a scanner/printer, but I don’t know what any of the technical terms mean, so it’s hard to know if I have my eye on the right thing)
So, thoughts? Brand suggestions? Things to beware of or look for specifically? Any other ideas? All advice is appreciated!
Life seems but a quick succession of busy nothings.
– Jane Austen
Sorry I didn’t return to regular programming – I got busy dealing with the body shop, the insurance adjustor, a lying student loan company supervisor (Oh, you’ll call me back in 48 hours, max? Really? I think someone’s pants are on fire.), and crappy apartment maintenance people (Oh, you can’t come today like you said you would, but you’ll be here first thing in the morning? Really? Oh, you’re sorry you couldn’t make it this morning, but it’s after hours now and a dishwasher is not an emergency but you promise you’ll be here tomorrow? Really? Oh, you couldn’t make it again today, but this time you super-duper promise you’ll make it tomorrow? Really? Suck on it. If I get West Nile virus from the nasty, standing water in the bottom of my dishwasher, I may go all Lawyer on you.) – and frankly, was not in the mood for Things to Be Happy About. But don’t you worry, I have a bang-up Christmas edition all ready to go for you – it will be like an extra present for you to open Christmas morning!
So the car: remember how I said how thankful I was that the damage wasn’t extensive? Either I know nothing about cars, the body shop and insurance adjustor are ripping me off, or I jinxed myself. I think it’s the first one, but I’m not positive. We’re up to $2200 and they haven’t even put the car on the lift yet. Awesome. Thank god I wasn’t one of those people who said ”Oh, I never get in accidents, so I can handle a $1500 deductible.” I know myself better than that, and went for $500. That hurts, especially at the holidays, but it could be worse.
Remember also how I said how great my boss is? He gave us Christmas presents yesterday, which I was not expecting at all (we already did our “annual round robin gift exchange,” you know). Two words: Coach wristlet. If you know anything about me, you know I do not care about labels and I would never buy myself Coach anything, but I was amazed at his generosity. It’s beautiful and classic – plain black leather – but I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with it. Does anyone use one of these? I’m stumped in the face of such a thing.
Speaking of gifts, I am officially done, and everything is wrapped, as of last night. Actually, that’s a lie. I left one thing for my brother unwrapped because I may have to exchange it after I get to his house tonight and see if he already has it. He won’t be there til Sunday night – he’s on an out-of-town job – so it will be safe.
And speaking of my brother, welcome him to the blogosphere, won’t you? He’s not a great speller, but I love him anyway.
“I’ll never be a rich man, but what happy man ever was?”
– J, November 1, 2001
You know, I don’t worry that much about money. The truth is, I make a comfortable living; I have everything I need, and plenty of things I want (more than necessary, if you believe my mother), and enough to give a little to causes I care about. Don’t get me wrong – I have plenty of bills, and I’ll probably be in debt til I die for law school, but it all seems to work itself out somehow.
I didn’t become a lawyer for the money, and working in the public sector, I don’t make the kind of money that makes people think lawyers make a lot of money. I knew when I went to law school that “Big Law” wasn’t for me – I’m not interested in 80-hour work weeks, billable hour requirements, corporate law, and wearing a suit every day. I went to school near New York City, though, so many of my classmates went the BigLaw route, and when I first heard that they were making $160,000 right out of the gate (my friends aren’t bragging; big-firm salaries are public knowledge), I had a momentary pang of “Maybe I was a little hasty.” But I like my job, and I like my life here, and I am grateful that I haven’t yet had to work a weekend or a late night (though it’s probably inevitable that I will before I leave this job).
During the past several weeks, however, Above the Law has been reporting on year-end bonuses in BigLaw, and the numbers are just staggering: $35,000 for first-year associates (pro-rated, since they didn’t start until after the bar, but still); second-years are getting that much, plus “special bonuses” of $10,000 or more. It’s mind-boggling, and part of me can’t help but think how much easier things would be with that money.
The larger part of me, though, knows I would never really want to do the work required to earn those bonuses. And they do earn them. It’s not like they’re sitting in their offices, updating their fantasy football teams or shopping at Pottery Barn online (and if it is like that, don’t email me; I don’t want to know). The people I know in BigLaw are super-smart, they like their jobs (for the most part), and they work their asses off, and they’re worth every penny those firms will pay them.
But I’m just sayin’: Christmas is coming. I accept gift cards.
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